You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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