Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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