I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
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