is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Of course I have a pirate flag
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
