So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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