Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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