there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
