i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
