Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I think my moral compass just broke
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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