He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
Randomize
