There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
