I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
These 23 Groupies Had The Most Insane Sexual Experiences With Celebs
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
35 Of The Funniest Things People Said While Banging
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present