One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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