I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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