we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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