Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Randomize
