I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize