Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
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