oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
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