If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
