whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
