what day is it and did you see me today?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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