we have officially lost it.
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
