you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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