My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
