We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
