i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Fuck me I smell like cheese
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize