So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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