So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Randomize
