Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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