Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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