would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
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