why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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