so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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