I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
