Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Randomize
