just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize