Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
