Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
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