She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
