so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
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I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
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Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
there is puke in my bra ... again
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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