She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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