He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
