If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
I did not marry a roomba.
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