what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
