Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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