She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
