We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize