He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize