Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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