i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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